Fucking Figs! Oh, just Eat Me!

Ray said, "Jesus is without question the most eloquent Man who ever lived. Those who heard Him said, "Never a man spoke like this Man." The most eloquent of philosophers sits at His feet and marvels and both His words and His life. To those who disagree, I would simply challenge to read the Gospel of John, and see for yourself. Never did any man speak like this Man."

Well, let's read a passage in John (5:53-58)

"Except ye eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink his blood, ye have no life in you. Whoso eateth my flesh, and drinketh my blood, hath eternal life."

I'm marvelling at his words at this very minute. Sounds like Jesus believed he could make vampires. No blood for me today, Jesus, I'll have a V-8 though if its not too much trouble.

Let's try Matthew 21: 18-19

"Now in the morning, as he returned into the city, and when he saw a fig tree in the way, he came to it, and found nothing thereon, but leaves only, and said unto it, Let no fruit grow on thee henceforth for ever. And presently the fig tree withered away."

God was surprised that there weren't any figs...when it wasn't the right season (Mark 11: 13)...and then in a temper tantrum curses the tree??? Wow, what a sage! More elegant than Shakespeare, for sure. The other day, Ray was blathering on about how bananas and other fruit (i.e. creation) proves the existence of the creator Jesus/Father/Holy Ghost. Yet Jesus doesn't even know what the average farmer living in the region knows...and He is supposed to be the omniscient creator of the universe! Or his son...whatever. In Ray's defense, it is easy to see why he would think Jesus so elequent-he probably hasn't read very many other books. We should chip in and send him a few (like The God Delusion).

Reposted from Of Microbes and Men

Dr. Ray Comfort, L.D.

Atheists, according to Ray, we are a "primitive", "particularly proud" bunch, who erroniously think we are "related to Gorillas" and "originally came from a puddle of mud". While we thought we "knew everything", we are in fact "so primitive in [our] thinking" that we "only believed in what [we] could see". All the while, we are completely unaware of "the deadly disease that was killing" us which is "promoted by [our] filthy lifestyle". Ray had a dream that he was a doctor (which could only happen in his dreams) who's job it was to "innoculate" us-"to hold still while I plunged a needle into [our] tender flesh". But he must be careful because we are, afterall, "particularly vicious by nature".

How wise Ray is...almost makes an idol out of himself doesn't he? Which in his business, is rather foolish. Will he start referring to himself as "He" on his blog, and force everyone who comments to capitalize "he". Or, in Ray's case, do we need to capitalize the "e" as well? So it should read, "doesn't "HE". In any case, we all need to trust in Ray's interpretation of Holy Writ. Afterall, with the "filthy lifestyle" of thinking, and reading, and being all moral, we really need guidance! What a primitive bunch, questioning and demanding evidence. We're a bunch of cavemen! Now, should we be like preachers or like laypeople? If like preachers, I suppose we should rob from the poor to make ourselves rich and pretend like we talk to the lord and wear funny hats so we appear all powerful-like. Or if like laypeople, should we just unquestioningly accept all the dogma and idiocy (like the banana bullshit) that will fit down our gullet, and keep stroking the checks? Would that be a 'clean lifestyle'? Filthy! I may say 'fuck' on here, but thats far less "filthy" than the lies and deceit that people like Ray Comfort spread.

Also, is anyone else terrified when religious people talk about "innoculating" people? Get in line for your booster: 1 cc of sodium Jesuthol...or was it 'gerin oil'?

Reposted from Of Microbes and Men

Ray Goes 'Nanners'

Ray lies about quote-mining, and now misrepresents the skeptics argument against his stupid banana example, which he now calls proof and not proof. He uses the coke can/banana bit as the old "watchmaker" argument....if it looks designed, it is! Here he tries to make it sound like we've removed his example of the coke can. For anyone unfamiliar with the banana debackle, watch this:



A skeptic writes, "Referring to your video where you said that the existence of ridges on a banana that matches your hands, is proof that God exists. Since Apples don't have ridges, is it proof that God does not exist? Or that God did not create the Apple?"

This is a perfectly legit question given Ray's "proof" where he claims the creator shaped the banana to make it most easy and pleasurable for us to eat. I would have gone with a more painful fruit to deal with as the video I will post (and most of you have already seen, I'm sure) demonstrates. Now Ray, angry that he is always shown to be the one lying, misrepresenting and, well, being himself, so he tries (constantly I might add) to make it look like atheists misrepresent him too. Does he succeed? While you already know the answer, let's find out!

Ray responds,

"Thanks to Youtube I realize that I will have to say this over and over. Many times I have compared a banana to a coke can (with its tab at the top, etc.) using something called "parody." This is arguably a humorous way of making a point. Atheists removed the coke can and said that I believe that the banana is proof that God exists. In doing so they did a good job and making a monkey out of me. The banana isn’t proof that God exists--the whole of creation proves that there’s a Creator. This includes apples, oranges, pears, peaches, apricots, grapes and other succulent fruits that God has placed into our hands. They didn’t come from a big bang. That is mindless. They came from the creative genius of a benevolent and holy God, who also gave you life itself, and eyes to look at that which He has so kindly lavished upon you. "

Ray "made a monkey" out of himself just doing the video, we aren't doing it by pointing it out. He claims that we misrepresent his infantile design argument by leaving out the coke can...the writer was simply trying to get you to extend it to other fruits, i.e., do the same with another fruit. This was done so the argument can be brought out to a reductio ad absurdum where we get to a fruit that is simply a pain in the fucking ass to open and we show how stupid the banana bit is. Ray, please, as we have to explain "over and over", we get the whole 'coke cans are designed, they have "pull tabs", banana's also have "pull tabs", so they too must be designed' bit. We get it. We're just not impressed by it. You know why, Ray? BECAUSE HUMANS DOMESTICATED THE GODDAMN BANANA, THAT'S WHY. ALONG WITH THE OTHER FUCKING FRUIT THAT YOU LIST. Jesus Christ, take a fucking horticulture course. I picture Ray in batman jammies, with a sippy cup full of chocolate milk, thinking that right before God placed Adam and the rib woman in "the garden", He was busy planting citrus trees and working on that "pull tab". Has anyone explained to Ray how babies are born? I'm worried that he wonders, with all the babies around, why he hasn't seen any damn storks flying around. Can someone please point him and everyone else to the video below (not that he hasn't seen it), and give an explanation of how we domesticated the banana??? Also, I'm getting sick of Ray writing "the whole of creation proves that there’s a Creator". Yes, Ray, if in fact this is a "creation" you would be right that there would need to be a creator, by definition. Let's go ahead and establish the whole "creation" thing first and then we'll follow you to the conclusion. Fruit ain't gonna cut it. Is he so stupid...nay, did he think we are so stupid that we don't know how the fruit we buy at Walmart got to be the way it is today? Christians, he is insulting your intelligence, and his theology gives you very little reason to believe in his god, as you'll see in the video below.
For any theists out there, or anyone for that matter, who read




Reposted from Of Microbes and Men

Bananas is Contagious - Todd Has It Too

A close friend of Ray Comfort's has blessed us with another example of pure critical thinking. Listen as Christian radio motormouth Todd Friel discusses Pyramid Power on the Way of the Master Radio show. As a crazy coincidence, his story contains bananas, making it eligible to be posted here. It was preceded by a discussion about spoonbending, that also hinted that demons are involved, but we all know that that makes perfect sense.

Pyramids, them has demonz

This reminds me of another story from a "believer" I read over at Ray Comfort's blog ages ago. I think it was user verandoug who recalled her run-in with demonic powers as she was playing light as a feather, stiff as a board when she was a young girl. According to her, demons had to be involved in that event, nothing else could explain it. 

These are only two examples, but it frightens me to think that when people encounter a counterintuitive occurrence, they decide that it's either Jebus or the Debil who's behind it and judge the event accordingly. This effectively barricades any trail of inquiry that could help them get more in touch with reality. When you have belief you apparently don't need any further knowledge, effectively keeping you, well, ignorant.

Don't go bananas, it won't let you go.

Ray Comfort - Argumentum ad Bananum

The Atheists' Nightmare

This Post is a Test

A test that is bright yellow, long and curved.